Bringing baby home

Babies are sweet bundles of joy, right? Babies do bring joy, but they also add additional stress and complications. After their baby is born, about two-thirds of couples say that they are not as happy with their relationship. Although they are happy to have their baby, it is hard to feel close to each other. They may have trouble remembering what life was like when it was just the two of them. Warmth and intimacy is often replaced by irritability, exhaustion and emotional distance. This is a surprise to most people, and they often feel discouraged about the state of their relationship.

The good news is that couples can successfully navigate this transition to parenthood. Things will not be the same as before baby was born, but people can develop a “new normal,” which includes room for both their relationship with their baby and their relationship with each other.

Research by Dr. John Gottman, co-founder of The Gottman Institute, has identified several things couples can do to keep their relationships strong and has built workshops around those findings. The motto of the workshop sums it up: “Small things often.” Too often couples expect that their relationship will only get better with big, romantic gestures. However, success in relationships depends on the quality of the everyday, seemingly insignificant ways they interact with each other.

Northwest Family Services offers a workshop at PeaceHealth Southwest Medical Center called “Bringing Baby Home.” The workshop incorporates the fruits of Dr. Gottman’s research. Couples learn important skills for staying connected to each other and to their baby. They will learn how to stay connected and continue discovering more about each other, how to communicate in way the other person can understand and how to resolve conflict. All these are important skills to model to one’s children. Also, the quality of the couples’ relationship dramatically affects their children’s emotional, physical, and social development.

Northwest Family Services is offering the Bringing Baby Home workshop at PeaceHealth Southwest Medical Center on March 3rd, 10th, 17th, and 24th, from 6:30-9:00 pm. The workshop will give couples a chance to invest in their relationship and provide a strong foundation for their child’s emotional development. To get more information, visit Bringing Baby Home or call 503-546-6377.

The workshop is scheduled to be repeated in June and October 2010.

Information provided by Angela Rosson, Licensed Professional Counselor and a Marriage and Relationship Educators