Never losing hope

For most of my life I have been overweight, but by March 2008 I was grossly obese, being just 5’2” and weighing in at 330 lbs. The doctors had already told me that if I wanted to have children, I would have to lose at least 150 pounds and, due to the Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, would probably still need fertility treatments.

My husband and I had talked about adoption, but for some reason we just never put our plans into action. For longer than I could remember I’ve wanted to be a mother.

Last March, something sort of clicked for me and one day I found myself researching diets on the internet and reading reviews about The Biggest Loser. I’d suddenly decided that I’d had enough of being out of breath going up the stairs, having trouble completing the grocery shopping and, mostly, that I was ready to be thinner. I also felt that relentless yearning to be a mother. With these thoughts in mind, I visited my doctor, a nutritionist, and a psychologist.

Slowly, I fell into a routine and the weight started coming off. My first big celebration was when I weighed under 300 pounds. The doctor said it had been more than 18 months since I weighed less than 300 lbs. It was exciting and it made me realize that I could succeed at this. I persevered, ever looking at my list of reasons for losing weight, with the number one reason to be a mom. Then in October of 2008, my blood sugars came back well below the diabetic mark. I weighed less than I had in over three years and I was feeling excellent. In November, my cycle regulated itself and became “normal”.

In February of 2009, I started a Weight Loss Challenge at my gym. This included a 1200 calorie a day diet and an hour of cardio, plus weight training six days a week. It was a big commitment, but I was ready. Two weeks into the program, I fell ill. I spent one day, then two, being so nauseated I could do little more than lay on the couch. My husband suggested I take a pregnancy test. I laughed, but took one anyway and it was negative. I wasn’t really shocked, I’d only lost little more than 80 pounds and was no wear near the 150 the doctor had told me I’d need to lose.

Five days later, I was still unbelievably sick, so I took myself off to the doctor. She insisted I take another pregnancy test before doing any blood work. You can imagine my utter surprise when she informed me the test came back positive. I was pregnant. It was the miracle of miracles. Somewhere, in the back of my mind, I had begun to lose a little hope that having a baby would ever happen for me. I realized then that sometimes God works in mysterious ways. And perhaps his way of reminding me of his presence was to provide me with the one thing I had wanted for so long.

I’m currently 18 weeks pregnant and while the pregnancy has not been an easy one, I am still thankful every day for my little miracle. And I’m excited for the day when I get to meet the person who reminded me that God is always near.

This is my true story. My weight loss journey is not over, and I fully expect to continue losing weight once the baby has been born. I’m working hard to make sure that other people know not to lose hope when things don’t go their way. Sometimes you have to make a big commitment to be rewarded for your hard work and sometimes you just need faith that everything will turn out OK. This child really is my miracle and I truly hope I never forget that. I also try to encourage overweight woman to take control of their lives and to know that they don’t need surgeries or expensive programs to lose the weight.

Michelle Schutzman lives in Battle Ground, Wash., and is enjoying her first pregnancy.

Read more about weight and conception:
Weigh your options before pregnancy 
Pregnancy and the overweight woman

Past Local News articles:

Giving birth YOUR way by Adriana García
Celebrating the imperfect mother in all of us by Nikki Klock 
The Inner Child by Dana Layon