Posted by: YBYWadmin in Preconception, Infertility on
Jun 03, 2010
When my husband and I had trouble conceiving (admittedly, I got a late start at age 35), friends suggested that we take a vacation. I thought they were crazy, but I have to say that our son was born in early March, putting conception just about the time my husband and I took a week-long backpacking trip the previous summer. Maybe the vacation from stress was responsible, or just opportunity to spend time together away from it all.
Did you had a similar experience? Do you believe a vacation from stress and the opportunity to relax can help you conceive? Tell us what you think.
Last year, after we lost our baby, Jacob, we decided we wanted to try again as soon as possible. We got the green light and figured in nine months we would be holding a little newborn baby. Thats how it works right? We had the thought that it would be easier to deal with losing him if we had another baby that could not have been here otherwise. (does that make any sense?) So we began...
First month, no baby. Second month, no baby. Now I was getting worried...what if something was wrong with me? It should not be this hard right? I bought all kinds of ovualtion and pregnancy tests and still no baby. Every month I felt bloated and was sure this is the month! Then I would take the tests (early because I have no patience, so I would take them daily for a week or two:) only to be let down again. It was frustrating and pretty depressing, every month I had to start all over again. You have no idea how many people in Vancouver are pregnant until you can't seem to get pregnant.
This was one of the frist blogs I wrote, but also still one of the most common questions i get in my practice. I thought it was worth repeating.... Enjoy.
Anyway, a question that I'm asked a lot is "when is the right time to start a family?" I wrote an article about this is Lacamas Life (It's a magazine in Clark County, in case you don't know!) a couple of years ago. My answer then is the same as it is now. There is no right time.
"What??!"
It's ALWAYS the right time. (Well, there are a FEW obvious exceptions! HA!) More and more, women are in professional jobs. Time is often a commodity that is in short supply. Professionals often say to themselves, "If I can just get through (fill-in-the-blank), I'll have more time." Of course, we all know after that comes another something that "if I can just finish this..."
My wife and I thought finishing medical school would be good before having kids. Then we thought finishing our residency training would be better. THEN we thought it
Posted by: nikkik in Preconception on
Sep 10, 2008
My husband and I disagree on whether or not to have another baby. We've got two beautiful girls, ages 5 and 2, and I'd like to add one more to our brood. But my husband has no interest. I really do believe that if we found out we were pregnant right now that he would be very happy and excited, but he's not going to do it "on purpose." He even half-jokes about getting a vascectomy! I'm definitely not ready for that yet. Thankfully, we're not to a point where it's caused real conflict, especially because my desire for another child is very mild and I'm willing to wait - either until he changes his mind, or I'm ready to permanently call it quits. But I wonder if anyone else has experience with this, and how you worked through
The other night I watched a wonderful new documentary called Being Dad. The tagline, "40 Dads - 6 Experts - 9 months - 80 minutes" pretty much sums it up well. A father to be, in an attempt to learn more about the new journey upon which he will soon embark, sits down with dads all over the country and learns all about what it's like during pregnancy, delivery, and parenting. The guys talk candidly about everything from sex during pregnancy, to miscarriage, to premature labor, to epidurals, to caesarian section, to the feeling of elation that comes when the baby is finally born.
The film simultaneously follows Troy and his wife, Stacey, from morning sickness to first ultrasound, and finally to delivery. It actually shows the birth of their child, and it's amazing. I don't think I've ever watched a birth without crying. It is such a miracle. And it brought back memories of my own daughters' births and made me feel strong all over again for all the hard work I did to get them safely out!
Posted by: nikkik in Preconception on
Jul 01, 2008
When considering marriage, and eventually starting a family of your own, it's incredibly important to, as Dr. Laura Schlessinger says, "Choose wisely, treat kindly." I've only been married 8 years, but I have learned a thing or two about relationships and how important it is to think through the choice of marriage. In my opinion, love is simply not enough when it comes to building a life with another person. It's more like a business deal than a summer fling, although it's imperative that love is there as well. In other words, the ideal partner is someone whom you love passionately, but with whom you can also agree on important co-habitating and child-rearing issues such as:
religion
education
money
parenting styles
living location
Deciding to have children is a decision that will affect your and your child's life forever, and bind you to the baby's parent, so be sure you choose your spouse well. Then treat that spouse with love and respect the rest of your days. The positive impact on
Posted by: drchang in Preconception on
May 29, 2008
My wife and I asked ourselves that question many times over the stretch of time that we could not get pregnant. We tried multiple infertility treatments. Nothing. What was wrong with us?
We were healthy, took care of ourselves. (Well, the occasional Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese MIGHT have gone in my mouth...) Seemed like there were babies flying out all over the place among our friends and associates. We, of course, were happy for them, but still..... I had many a patient who "accidentally" got pregnant. "Why?" my wife and I would ask each other.
By the fifth round of infertility treatment, my wife was not eating well or sleeping very well from the stress she had placed on herself. She cried every time the pregnancy test would be negative. She felt she was somehow less of a woman and wife because she could not get pregnant. I, of course, couldn't have disagreed more, but she was falling into that despair that many women in this situation feel. Finally, I told told her
